Found

We just got sick and tired of enjoying our lives...

Obsessed with Halsey's SNL performance of 'Eastside'.

Why Depression Makes You So Damn Tired All The Time

These husband's comics about married life are too real.

I love how this quaint 800 SF apartment in Austin, TX is decorated.

The 10 year challenge: The Office edition.

86 Year Old Man Writes Touching Letter. Grab the goddamn tissues.

Then and Now: St. Augustine

This vasectomy party is everything. Snip snip!

Orlando murals.

Everyone Should Read This Gynecologist's Thread on Late-Term Abortions

Post-Divorce Glow Up. If you're unhappy get rid of the asshole and focus on YOU!

Jenna Fischer's many birthday surprises.

Taylor Swift helps couple celebrate their engagement.

What I Wore #81

A few weekends ago Dustin and I dressed up aka dressed nicer than usual but not like extravagantly so for a work dinner. I had gone shopping for something to wear because, surprise surprise, none of my other shit fits anymore. I was immediately drawn to the print on this skirt. It is so fun and a more modern take on the regular ol' animal print look. Plus the same exact print came in several different pieces. I was torn between the pants or the skirt but in the end you know what I went with.  It's hard to see in the photo but the waist band is stretchy (hell yes!) and ties which is a fun little detail. Also this skirt can be worn to work or even on a weekend with a regular t-shirt. It's versatile AF. I already owned the shirt but the flats are a fairly recent purchase. After months and months of battling it out with Target's flats I finally found some that weren't too wide for my narrow ass feet. They are almost exactly like a pair I used to have years ago and wore into the ground - quite literally. 

Shirt: Forever 21

Skirt: Target

Shoes: Target

Ashley's Next Top Therapist

I briefly discussed in recent posts that I went back on anxiety/anti-depressant medication at the beginning of the year. My doctor also suggested that I go back to therapy because studies have shown medication works better when paired with therapy. I was completely on board with this suggestion because I've been to therapy multiple times in the past and always had positive experiences.

I set up an appointment a few weeks ago at the UCF Community Counseling Center where I had been a couple times before over the last 15 years.

What is cool about them is it is completely free. 100% no charge at all.  Not only that but anyone can go (individuals, couples, families, etc. - you do not have to be a student) but spots fill up quickly at the beginning of each semester. The only "catch", which to me isn't really a catch but might make others uncomfortable, is the fact sessions are recorded so students who are helping you can receive feedback from their teachers. Everything is confidential though. I say all of this because I highly recommend their services especially since therapy can be so expensive and the cost is the reason a lot of people don't seek help in the first place.

I went to my first (and only) session which was mostly answering a lot of questions with only a little time spent talking about why I wanted to start therapy again. Overall it was fine but I wasn't totally convinced this time around. I decided a few days later I didn't want to continue because I didn't think it was a good fit therapist wise. Also there was the factor of the appointment being a little too late at night (which is hard for me and my tired self). I was feeling pretty defeated about it because I've had such success with them in the past.

I have also been to a regular therapist but each visit was close to $100 so I couldn't afford to go for long. So I knew that option was not going to work this time either. But then as luck or kismet or timing would have it a friend of mine posted on her Insta stories about her struggle with various mental health issues. I responded to her with my own struggles and at some point she mentioned she had been using Doctor On Demand for therapy. I had never heard of it so I looked into it and it's a pretty incredible service. You download the app and choose medical (sinus infections, colds, UTIs, some skin issues, etc.) or psychological. I put in my insurance information (for me it was only $25 but it may vary depending on coverage) and was directed to choose who I'd like to meet with. They give you lots of information about multiple therapists including full name, credentials, and areas of specialty. Once you find one you like you can then choose when you'd like to meet. I loved that there were so many options! You can also choose between 20 or 50 minute sessions. I went for the full 50 because it was the same price so might as well get all I can out of it, right?

The app. walks you through how it works by sending you a reminder before your appointment and telling you to make sure you're in an area with good WiFi and lighting. I just sat in my bedroom, logged into the app, and a few minutes later my therapist appears on the screen of my phone. She asked me a series of questions and then we just got right into it. I really loved her from the start. I felt like she listened to me and gave me not only good suggestions on how to handle certain things but also gave me a new perspective on the way I think about things. I have already set up my next appointment with her this week and I'm feeling very hopeful that this will be a great thing for me and my mental health.

I've always been fairly open about my issues because it's never been something I've been ashamed of.  Yes, I have anxiety. Yes, I have depression. Those things will always be a part of me but I'm constantly working on making them a smaller part of me. I like talking about mental health because the more it's talked about the more destigmatized it gets. But even more than that I feel like we all can help one another by sharing our own stories. I would not have found out about DOD had it not been for my friend bravely talking about her struggles. Just by her sharing that little bit of information helped me in such a tremendous way which is why I wanted to dedicate an entire blog post about it. Maybe one of you reading this needs help right now too or maybe you will in the future and now you know you have options. Resources and information are really key in helping one another become better people.


Adam's comics are my favorite and if you don't follow him on Instagram you're really missing out on some hearty laughs. 

Dustin Says

My idea of a bed and breakfast is falling asleep at Denny's.

STD commercial playing on the tv...
If I was on Tinder my bio would say "Let's meet at Quest Diagnostics first."

Talking to Olive...
You're light and fluffy like a pancake.

I like you so much that I love you.

That child knocked on our door like a full grown policeman.

Talking to Olive again...
Come on girl, let's watch Mission Impossible together.

Game Time

We hadn't seen the Benton's in what seemed like a lifetime but in reality it was probably just a few months so I asked Rachelle when they had a free weekend to meet up. She suggested Game Time in Daytona. I hadn't heard of it but she described it as a Dave and Busters type establishment and that's pretty much exactly what it is. They have a restaurant (which we ate at first), bowling alley, and a huge arcade. I would even say it's better than Dave and Busters because it was like 75% less crowded which made all of the difference. 

It brought me back to the very start of our foursome friendship when we'd drive down to Daytona and  shoot the shit. I remember going to the arcade at the Daytona Lagoon a couple times and looking back it was one of the saddest arcades but that's all we had back then ok?! It's always hilarious watching Dustin and Matt run around like little elementary aged kids playing all of the games together. It was also cool to see Addilyn experiencing it for what I'm guessing was her first time. She was in aw of all of the sounds and lights and prizes. She would mash a few buttons and say "I WON" and grin from ear to ear at Rachelle before racing across the building to another game. I mean at this age you don't even have to pay for the games because she didn't even care. She just wanted to be a a part of it and enjoy the experience - and if that doesn't warm your cold dead heart I don't know what will. 

I don't know what my deal is but my go-to is always skee-ball. I'm not some like skee-ball MVP or anything it just sparks joy goddamit. Rachelle and I played a game of giant Connect Four which was fun because you were timed which meant you had to decide quickly. We raced cars, fished, threw balls in bottles, played basketball, and everything in between. It was such a good time. 

It was a chilly day (or in Matt's world a frigid one). I think the high was like 60ish so nice AF. He froze as we walked back to the cars. Before saying goodbye I gave Rachelle her birthday presents since her day was the following one and I wouldn't see her for it. I got her a lot of different items for her desk at her new job! And then out of no where she gifts me this cute Harry Potter art piece FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON other than she's kind and amazing. 

As soon as March is over (because that month is ridiculously busy for both of us every year) we better start planning our next outing. 

What I Wore #80

Can you believe I haven't posted a WIW since last July?! What the actual fuck. I know I have taken photos of outfits but I guess they are all just hanging out on my computer. I'll try to get better at posting them more often even just for my own benefit. 

So Florida has been having a proper winter for once. It has been steadily in the 60s and below up until this week which Dustin and I have been loving. Cool weather makes my heart happy. Part of the reason I get so happy about it is being able to layer clothes. I'm currently not loving my body so being able to cover a lot of it up is fantastic and honestly makes me feel better and prettier. Also sweaters are cozy as fuck especially the one seen in this photo. I got it on sale at Target (Universal Thread brand) and I thought I wouldn't be able to pull off the oversized sweater lewk but I totally can AND AM. It is so soft. So comfy. SO COZY. Like if I could live my life in this sweater I would but unfortunately I need to shower and live in Florida so it's not in the cards. The shirt is one Dustin bought me right after the Pittsburgh Tree of Life Synagogue shooting. All of the proceeds go to the synagogue directly which makes it even better. I have been rocking these checkered vans ever since Dustin gave them to me for Christmas. I make sure every outfit I wear on weekends go with them because right now I don't want to wear any of my other shoes. Sorry not sorry. 

Shirt: Steel City

Sweater: Target

Jeans: Target

Shoes: Vans

Tweet Tweet

Well I'm way behind on this. Like last year behind.

9/8/18
"Their snickerdoodle cookies are the fix of the century!" - random woman at Trader Joe's

9/10/18
I feel bad for people without middle names. #periodemotions

I’m “can everyone at this concert just agree to sit down” years old

— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) September 21, 2018

9/28/18
My brain while sporting a fanny pack: OMG where is my purse?! Oh that's right I'm wearing it around my waist.

9/30/18
Random pet peeve: when actors are clearly wearing makeup when just "waking up" (and not the smeared slept-in-my-makeup from last night kind). Also a character was detained for 36 hours and yet her hair and makeup are still somehow perfect. Can tv and movies get more realistic?

10/23/18
Can everyone just have Venmo already?

10/24/18
One of my three chin zits is a zombie. I keep killing it and it keeps coming back from the dead!

Can we just fast forward to the part where Beto O'Rourke is President?

— Renee Libby (@ReneeLibby2) October 24, 2018

10/30/18
Real talk: I'm scared for my mental health once the election results are in.

Vote for the kids who would be old enough to vote Tuesday but got shot in fucking school because Republicans are addicted to NRA money.

— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) November 4, 2018

Beto/Gillum 2020.

— Busy Philipps (@BusyPhilipps) November 7, 2018

11/7/18
Random pet peeve: when someone tells you a story using names of strangers instead of their relationship to the person. I DON'T KNOW BOB, CAROL! How am I supposed to understand what's going on?

11/8/18
The first thing Dustin's grandma said to us when we walked in was "How are my great grand cats?" And that is a woman after my own heart.

11/21/18
How did/do SFR with one car garages even get built? And whose idea was it? So dumb. One car garages for duplexes or townhomes make sense but not SFR.

11/22/18
Definitely the only one who isn't feeling the live action Lion King trailer.

11/24/18
Mister Rogers much like myself doesn't have a great singing voice but that doesn't stop either of us from belting it out.

11/26/18
I'm adding 'have Katie Jane Hughes do my makeup' to my life list.

11/30/18
None of my friends will talk about the new Miley Cyrus music video with me and it's pissing me off.

12/3/18
I don't even have kids but I am so over the slime craze it's not even funny.

pic.twitter.com/hhMjDkEEsK

— PostSecret (@postsecret) December 14, 2018

1/21/19
Woke up to an internal nostril zit. Such a Monday thing to deal with.

1/22/18
I forgot to put deodorant on and now it's all I can think about.



1/23/18
I've been bleeding since last year. #adumbjokethatisactuallytrue

Recently

Feeling: Tired. So damn tired. Like tired in a way that just isn't normal for an early 30s childfree person who doesn't have a lot of stress factors. I'm tired when I wake up, I'm tired at work (sometimes I take a quick nap in my car), at the gym, and at home. I've had blood work done in the past and everything came back normal. My most recent blood-work in November showed that my iron was low but my doctor never mentioned needing supplements. If you read this post you know I've been struggling with period/birth control issues. After FORTY SIX days of being on my period I'm finally off and my body is getting back on track. I think it's safe to say the extra blood loss has not helped my energy levels. I don't know what to do at this point. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed I start to feel better soon.

Watching: 

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Sex Education - This show is SO GOOD. It is not only clever and raunchy but  easy on the eyes and heart warming as fuck. I seriously have a crush on the entire cast especially Gillian Anderson. I love her whole vibe on this show. Also I think it's such a cool aesthetic that it is set in present day but everyone dresses like they're in the 80s. I read somewhere the creator did it as a nod to John Hughes' movies. I've been holding out finishing it because once I do it's over and I don't want it to be. But at least I know a second season is on the horizon!

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Derry Girls - This show is set in 90's Ireland. Now I do suggest turning on the subtitles just because some of the accents are a bit thick but don't let that turn you off. The girls are so hilarious and I love all the shenanigans they always get themselves into.

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True Detective - Dustin and I are obsessed with season three just like we were with the first. It is a proper "anthology crime drama".  It's nice to look forward to Sunday nights again even if there are only three more episodes left. What the happened hell happened to Julie Purcell?!

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Homecoming - Dustin and I started watching this one together but then he got bored. I'm still in it to finish it because I want to know what happens and I don't find it boring whatsoever. I find it to be just the opposite. I think the plot set up is timed just right. I've still got a few episodes to go so I'm hoping it ends well.

YouTube - Ok I've always dabbled in watching different things on YouTube from life style bloggers to make up gurus to BuzzFeed. My current favorite feeds are: The Try Guys, Kids React (if you want to feel super old), Cut, and for some real wholesome content Kids Meet.


Listening to:

Gladiator - I blew through this podcast at the beginning of the year. As you can tell from the photo this delves into the life of Aaron Hernandez and oh what a life it was. There were parts of his upbringing that crushed me but it's never an excuse to do the terrible things he did. I will say that this did not shine a positive light on the Gator nor the Patriots. Those organizations definitely played their part in helping him when they should have done the right thing.

Felonious Florida - I'm only four episodes into the first season but in true Florida form it is cuh-razy. The first season is about the Casey's Nickelodeon murders in South Florida in 1994. There is even an OJ Simpson tie in amongst others.

Dustin Says

The commercial said "trouble concentrating and mood swings"... I think I may have postpartum depression.

Dustin binge watching The Soprano's for the first time...
Tony reminds me a lot of myself. For the first couple seasons his best friend is named "Big Pussy". That's basically like me and Cheeto.

On my shoulder dancing...
It's the only move you've got but goddamn is it a good one!

On Tidying Up with Marie Kondo...
That show is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.

I've got a trailer park brain.