NYE

I always like to look back on the previous year via internet post. I usually recap everything by month - good and bad. Since this past year was so rough on me, us - I have decided to just focus on the FUN. So here are all the good memories that 2011 brought.

JANUARY
-New Job!
-Nike Snuggles
-Leave it to Dustin to keep long distance living funny.
-Started kinecting.

FEBRUARY
-Giant Cupcake making with M
-Jimmy Eat World
-Steelers are going to the SUPERBOWL.
-Movie date with Amanda & friends.
-Hello new house.
-Melody was in town and I got to see her!

MARCH
-Cody visits!
-Dustin and I celebrate SIX years together.
-Beach day with Katie & Co.
-Big trees.
-We have a nephew! Ca$h.

APRIL
-Family game night.
-Dustin turns 26! I bought him a custom painting & made him a quilt.
-Enjoyed a viewing of 'Love Story' with my mom.

MAY
-NERF or nothing.
-Aub turns FOUR.

JUNE
-Wekiva Springs.
-Celebrate my 26th Flag Day.
-Hang with Smike.
-Go shopping with KT.

JULY
-Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part 2! Fuck yeah!
-Family time.
-Friend time.
-Kierce's elmo party.

AUGUST
-We went canoeing!
-High school mini-reunion.
-Dinner with Erin.
-Miranda turns TWENTY.

SEPTEMBER
-Matt's surprise.
-Target dress-up.

OCTOBER
-Yoga buds.
-My BFF Olivia.
-Pumpkins and goats.
-Jack's Mannequin.
-Sims PETS!
-Pump carving.
-Costume contest.

NOVEMBER
-Rock Band with Erin.
-Lake hanging.
-Harry Potter peeps.
-Seester & Starbucks.
-Stand By Me on the lawn.

DECEMBER
-Get togethers.
-EPCOT.
-Presents.
-Christmas party.
-Friendly visits.
-Christmas Eve.
-Christmas.

I'm BACK!

Excited? It's ok, a high five will do just fine.

As most of you have noticed, my friends especially, I haven't been blogging for almost a month. I needed a bit of a break. I needed to get my head on straight. I feel like I have been saying that a lot lately, but it is what it is - the truth.

I love being able to share my thoughts or interests or internet finds with my friends (& even those strangers who stop by) but it's always been a struggle to find a balance. A balance from sharing things but still staying true to myself. When I only had my LiveJournal to keep me company, I wrote about everything. The good, the bad, the honest, the ridiculous without the need to explain anything. It was just what was going on in my mind. It was and still is such a great release for me.

I need to get EVERYTHING out, all of the time. That's just me. I can't keep things in or I feel kind of panicked. It has to come out in some form. Plus I really enjoy being able to look back at what I've written and reflect. So I've come to the conclusion to get back into the blog world BUT also keep up with my LiveJournal too. My LiveJournal from here on out will be completely 100% private. What does that mean for G&G? Nothing really. Nothing will really change because although I do talk about personal things, I censor myself A LOT on here. I need my LJ to be raw, honest, and sometimes just plain harsh without feeling judged by the internet community. They are my thoughts for me to do with whatever I please. I just feel the best way to share with friends and keep myself sane is to kind of separate the two.

I really appreciate anyone and everyone who reads this thing. So leave me some comments to let me know you have stopped by.

Found

Andrew talks to CNN about his new CD People and Things. And if you forgot to DVR Jimmy Kimmel to see Mr. McMahon perform live - click here.

Hey Santa! I want one of these.

An awesome video for marriage equality.

TEN is back! They are coming out with another CD. Hallelujah! 5 long years I've waited for this news.

I can really relate to 95% of this.

The stakes are high, the water's rough But this love is ours.
Oh Taylor, let's be BFFs. Love her new video.

My kind of wrapping!

Starting to look a lot like XMAS

Our tree has been up since Thanksgiving night.

How will we ever tell whose stocking is whose? AND this made me giggle.

We are really bad at Christmas. We already opened a present each. He got me Taylor Swift's Speak Now live CD/DVD. He even watched it with me over the weekend and he may not admit this but he knows the words to every song. He even wrote his number on his hand just like T-Swift writes 13 on hers. Goofball.

I got him a new fancy silver xbox controller which has been getting a lot of use the last few days.
We plan to open more gifts this weekend and we'll probably be done by next. It's just how we roll. We've tried to stop but who really cares? Every family has their own traditions so this is ours. Opening up our presents whenever the fuck we feel like it!

Like Jack, Sawyer, & Freckles

Lately, I have been feeling lost. I'm irritable. I'm distant. I'm uninterested. I'm in the funkiest of funks. I tried everything to just feel like myself again. Why can't I feel like myself? Sounds simple enough. Even my blog has taken a backseat. A backseat to what? Nothing at all. It's not like I'm so busy with something else I don't have time to write down my daily happenings. I just don't FEEL like it. It's so weird especially because I always feel the need to document everything. The minute something makes me feel sad, or happy, or nostalgic, or pissed - I want to write it down. That hasn't really been the case lately. I don't know why. I hope it passes. Everything passes eventually, right?

Last night I had such a good talk with Dustin. It's really lifted my spirits. It's made me realize a lot of things. It's made me appreciate even more. I'm a lucky gal to walk this life with that meatball by my side. Truly I am. Thick and thin. Me and him.

Sorry friends, if I seem different. It's temporary I promise. I'll be back soon.

Christmas Playlist

Why do people hate it so much? I love it! I love it even more when it's sung by musicians I listen to all year long but there are a couple guilty pleasures. Here's the music I'll be listening to until 12/25.

FAVORITE BANDS

Schuyler Fisk - She just came out with a holiday CD and it's the best. I've been listening to it for about a week now (even broke my rule of no Christmas music until AFTER Thanksgiving.) The whole things great but I especially love 'More than I wished for' & 'It's Christmas, So We're Singing'.

Thrice - They definitely have the best version of Carol of the Bells (couldn't find on itunes) and Dustin Kensrue's A Stick, A Carrot, & A String is pretty awesome too.

Taylor Swift - I love Taylor's regular music but I only really liked 'Last Christmas' off her xmas CD.

Blink 182 - 'I won't be home for Christmas' is one of my absolute faves. Best line: It's Christmas time again, It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand all year.
New Found Glory - 'Ex-Miss' is one of the catchiest holiday tunes out there.
Jimmy Eat World - I'm not sure if this is even technically a Christmas song but it's pretty and the word Christmas is in it so I always add it to my playlist - 12.23.95.
Something Corporate - The most truthful and realistic of all my holiday music - Forget December.

NEW FAVES

The Maine - I don't ever listen to this band. But damn do I love 'Ho Ho Hopefully'.
Makeout Party - Comparing Ugly Sweaters

CLASSICS

Paul McCartney - My mom would be so proud that her beloved Paul made the list. Who doesn't love 'Wonderful Christmastime'?

Bobby Helms - No other song can make it truly feel like Christmas than 'Jingle Bell Rock'.

Alvin and the Chipmunks - Love these guys and of course The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late).

GUILTY PLEASURES

Hanson - Snowed In is hands down one of the best Christmas albums EVER. Not kidding even a little. I especially love 'At Christmas' and 'Christmas Time'.

N'Sync - Never liked them. Never owned one CD of theirs. But damn do I love me some 'Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays'!

Britney Spears - Can't go wrong with 'My Only Wish'.

Dustin Says

"Why are you yelling at me with your eyes?"

"Jamiroquai's parents must have been virtually insane to give him that name."

"Making memories with the friends you'll eventually hate."

On Sidney Crosby's return to hockey: "It's like my best friend is coming back!"

"You are so into this movie you could be an extra."

"I am like a velociraptor and you are the fence that keeps them in."

That's How the Pumpkin Pie Crumbles...

All I'm going to say about Thanksgiving is...I've had better.
Next year I'm taking Dustin up on his suggestion to order Boston Market - just the two of us.

My face says really says it all anyway...


And so does Dustin's.

Thankful

(source)

I love Thanksgiving.
I love the time spent with family.
I love wearing cozy sweaters (even if it is 80 degrees in Florida).
And of course the food!

More than all of that though is remembering to be thankful for what I have. I've said it several times but this year has kicked my ass. Kicked Dustin's too. It's actually still trying to beat us down a bit. Some days life wins. Some days we fight and get angry with each other because of it. Life is hard and being an adult isn't always what it's cracked up to be. This year has probably been the toughest year we have had to endure. But I have managed to look past all of the hard times. I choose to keep moving forward. Keep fighting for what I want. And to be thankful for everything I do have. Sure we have had our share of problems with jobs and finances and other random bullshit but we still have so much. I remind myself of this when I feel like acting like a whiny bitch. Because some days it's just easier to act that way. I have a lot. We have a lot together. I can't wait to welcome in a new fresh year and put this one behind us but I know we had to go through it for something. Everything happens for a reason and hopefully one day we'll know why. In the meantime I'm going to be extra thankful.

Today in particular, has proven to be a very hard one for me. I took today off work just because I thought it would be nice to have an extra long weekend - some time to myself. I did some crafting which lifted my spirits a bit but I have been sad. I've been missing him a whole lot. I'm just hoping the more time that goes by the less I will hurt. Days like this I just feel like giving up. I'm going to attempt to get out of this funk with an assortment of things. I'm hoping this list will help.

I am thankful for...

Framily - Dustin gets me through each and every day. We laugh on the good days and he lets me wipe my snot on his shirt on the bad ones. I really have no idea what I would do without him. Also, my immediate family - moms and siblings. They all continue to be there and support us through it all. Things aren't always easy but we seem to always come out ok in the end. My closest friends (you know who you are) - thank you for the daily quick 'hello, how's your day going?' messages and for the extended heart to hearts. To the people I only see or talk to once a year, please know I cherish those moments even though they are few and far in between.

You all mean so much to me and each and every one of you have a special place in my heart.

Health - I have always tried to remember this one each and every day, but it's not until I started working in healthcare that I started to truly appreciate what good health means.

Basics - Jobs. A home. Paid bills. Food & water. Fresh air. Love.

Other random things - iPhone. Computer. TV & DVR. Martinelli's Sparkling Apple Juice. Lazy pajama Sundays. The return of SIDNEY CROSBY. Air conditioning. Flip flops. Having vehicles. SIMS 3 & more recently Pets. Sweet compliments. Awesome co-workers. Unexpected snail mail. Pinterest! Inside jokes. Laughing until your abs hurt and you can barely breathe. Creativity. Forgiveness. Music/Concerts/iTunes. Rain days. Me time. A good book/movie.

phone photos

1. matching tattoos! no, not really. we were just trying out a new snowflake stamp i picked up at michaels. 2. we went shopping this weekend and the malls/stores are all filled with the prettiest of christmas trees. although i don't believe in decorating for xmas until after i eat my thanksgiving feast. 3. this bird looks fake right? but no, it's real! and he was just hanging out in a parking lot. dustin and i held up traffic for this picture. worth it? totally. 4. M <3 5. jamming/looking bummy while cleaning the house. 6. sparkly! it looked better in person. 7. we like to match our straws to our drinks. doesn't everyone? 8. breakfast casserole courtesy of my MIL. cheese on top of egg on top of sausage on top of potatoes! 9. driving my MIL and cash home. 10. pretty sunset. 11. jean friday. busted out my old ass sweater on top of a tanktop for a totally different look. plus, it's always freezing in my office. 12. starbucks with M! good convos and creepos. always fun!

dear photograph

dear photograph is a website with the tagline “take a picture of a picture from the past in the present”. i love to compare the old photo with the present day. you can always notice subtle differences. it's just so neat. each photo is also accompanied by a note. a letter of sorts. just a couple sentences. the minute i heard about this idea, i wanted to try it out.

so while spending time at my grandpa's house with my mom last weekend, i went through some pictures. my grandpa's house brings back a lot of great memories all by itself but the pictures definitely gave me that warm and fuzzy nostalgic feeling. even the pictures that were taken before my existence.

dear photograph,

me: age 4ish. this is one of my favorite photos of little me. first of all my outfit was just awesome. i'd wear it right now if i could. secondly, my expression. the only difference i can see in this photo are the modern trashcan and the door is now white instead of that mint green.

you still look like that sometimes.


another all time favorite photo of my mom (right) and aunt. i want to say this was taken in the early 70s.

the 70s seemed like so much fun. you girls are lucky to have experienced them.


my mom in her mid-late 20s. i love that it's a polaroid. i also love that you can tell it was taken on christmas because of the stockings hanging in the back ground.

i miss christmas at grandma & grandpa's house. i'm glad we still have the stockings.


me (left) and my cousin circa high school. early 2000s. not sure why i am dressed like a tangerine.

i loved when you came down to visit. i would cry every time you left. i only see you once a year these days but i hold on tight to those childhood memories of ours.


my uncle and aunt in high school? that bottom shelf behind them now holds pictures of me and my 3 other cousins.


this is just haunting to me. i feel like i'm watching my younger self or something.


everything still in the exact same place. just the updated version, except for the wire basket. i guess those haven't changed much in 20 years.


my mom holding baby me.


newborn me! apparently getting a bath. the counter and windowsill are the same but notice the curtains and i remember that watering can sitting on the ledge. i also love that you can see my grandma's and mom's hands.
hey kid, thankfully getting clean gets a hell of a lot easier!


my mom told me she was pregnant in this photo.
things have never been perfect but just like that hedge - we continue to grow.

sure things have changed since the original photos have been taken but i noticed that even more things haven't. so many little things are exactly the same when i was a kid, even when my mom was a kid.

it's like that quote from benjamin button: "it's a funny thing about comin' home. looks the same, smells the same, feels the same. you'll realize what's changed is you."

Hello how are you? Like your shoes, love your hair.

I am in the process of growing my hair out. We'll see how far I actually get but so far it's been super easy because of all the hairstyle tutorials I have been finding. They definitely keep me motivated. Most of them work best on longer hair but I have managed to find quite a few that work with my just past the shoulder length that I am working with now.

Finally figured out how to curl my hair with my straightner. I have tried this many times and never got it until I watched THIS tutorial. And THIS tutorial helped me create the half up 'swept away' look. I just made up that name but I think it fits. Right?

Found

Have an old iPod nano? You might be able to send it in for a replacement. Click here to read more. This is one of the many reasons I love apple so much. I have already filled out my request. Hopefully my nano qualifies!

Go VOTE for the People's Choice Awards. Harry Potter is nominated a lot - just saying.

25 Ways to Wear a Scarf! I can't wait to try these out. Get cold FL!

I was totally thinking the same on this topic.

The Hunger Games trailer is here!

Vintage glasses on babies! What could be cuter?!

Can I win the lottery so I can stay here? And this skinny house is just so cool.

Gronk, the Nord

FRIDAY:
MuggleNet tweeted Friday afternoon that some of the Harry Potter stars were expected to sign Deathly Hallows Part 2 DVDs later that night at a Walmart near the park. I got so excited. I asked all of my fellow HP friends if they would be interested in going. They weren't. The only friend who offered to join lives over an hour away and isn't even a fan (thanks again - that meant a lot). So I asked Dustin. I didn't want to because Skyrim just came out that day and he has been talking about this game for months. I knew he just wanted to sit home and play - understandably so. It's like if he asked me to go with him somewhere the same day Sims 3 was released. Plus there was a Pens game which he was also looking forward to watching. Despite all of that, he came with me. He actually offered. He sat in 45 min worth of pain in the ass Friday evening traffic just so I could enjoy the last little bit of Harry Potter. I'm always grateful he's in my life but moments like that are the ones that make me almost emotionally grateful.

We got to Walmart a little after 6PM. It was PACKED. The line had already started to form (well, DUH.) so we made our way to the back. The line just zig-zagged through random departments. We were in the male active wear/sleepwear section. Staring at 'Call of Duty' pajama pants for an hour really wasn't all that exciting. The screams started and we knew someone had arrived. It wasn't made clear exactly which HP stars would be there as most of them (apart from Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson) were in town for the DVD release party at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. (Side Note: I was going to get tickets to that but they were around $500 PER PERSON! So yeah...didn't work out.) It was almost 8PM when I found out who was actually there - Lavender Brown, Seamus Finnegan, Cho Chang, & Dean Thomas. I was excited to see them but kind of disappointed I didn't get to see the Grint (aka Ron Weasley) or Luna Lovegood or Lucius Malfoy. We decided to leave the autograph line to just get pictures of them instead. The line had barely moved and they would only be there for another hour. We wouldn't have made it anyway.

Lavender Brown (Jessie Cave) in pink. She had the cutest glasses on too.



Left in blue: Seamus Finnegan (Devon Murray)
Middle in black: Cho Chang (Katie Leung)
Right in blue: Dean Thomas (Alfie Enoch)

Dustin grabbed my legs and lifted me up for all of these photos. I was in such a rush to get there I didn't even bring my camera. I only had my iphone. Oh well. It was still fun and incredibly surreal to see these people so close up - in person. Even though I didn't get my DVD signed and some of the other actors didn't show, I don't regret going at all. I had a good time. Anything Harry Potter related is a good time to me.

SATURDAY:
I was planning on going up to Jax with Katie for a Diabetes Walk, but between my elbow issues and the fact I would have to get up at 5AM to do a lot of driving, it didn't work out. It sucks because I truly wanted to go. It seems that it was for the best though, especially since I couldn't knock feeling exhausted all weekend. No matter how much rest I got, I was tired. I just know that drive and walk would have kicked my ass even more. I'm blaming it all on the painters.

I didn't go to yoga either because I didn't want to risk hurting my elbow even more. I actually slept in Saturday morning for the first time in over 6 months. It felt good. Once Dustin was up, we ran some errands and grabbed some lunch.

I ended up spending the latter half of the day with my mom. We sat by the lake and just talked. Laughed a lot. We had a good time. It was rather refreshing. The breeze had just enough chill and the conversation flowed right along. I am grateful for that time. Time with my mom that was uninterrupted by television or phones. Quality time where I felt I was heard just as much as I listened.

I am not ashamed by the picture below. That was our Saturday night. Both in slippers (recent purchases as 80% of our house is tile) and a lovely front seat viewing of Deathly Hallows Part 2. And yeah, I cried just as much as I did when I saw it in the theater in July. It was such a cozy night. A perfect night.

SUNDAY:
My Sunday started with a visit with Christina and Chase. No pics. =/ I hadn't seen Chase since he was just a couple months old and here he was running, climbing, talking! I would slide down the slide first, then Chase, then Christina. It was an awesome slide - it had rollers. I thought it was the coolest new invention in playgrounds. Not sure how new it is. I couldn't tell you the last time I was at a playground and I don't have children so that might explain my fascination. I had never been to this particular park and I just loved how it was completely covered in trees. Lots of shade and the playground was really cool. Nice park, good friends, great time.

I got home and was still feeling exhausted. Pretty much the theme of my weekend. I took a nap for a couple hours. It didn't really help but I never turn down a Sunday afternoon nap. The rest of the day was filled with a Steelers WIN, catching up on the last two episodes of Fringe, and watching Dustin kill dragons on Skyrim.

It was a pretty simple weekend and although I never felt like my body caught up, I had a good time. How the hell is it over already?

phone photos

1. grillin'. 2. cooked and ready to eat. (it was delish!) 3. xmas stockings i made for the girls in my department at work. 4. glove + ice = icepack! hurt my elbow last weekend (i think at yoga?) and now anytime i bend it too much a pain shoots through my arm. fun stuff. i've been icing the shit out of it and taking aleve. fingers crossed it's actually healing. 5. this is how dark it was when i left work the other night. not a fan. 6. helping M make peanut butter cup rice krispies treats for her work's potluck tomorrow. my nephew cash was very interested in the whole process.

We Rock. Hard.

Erin came over Saturday to enjoy a movie (and brownies!). Then we decided we should bust out rock band. We haven't played since 2010 so it was a lot of fun. We got to download and sing new songs! Erin had never played before so she was getting really into it. Like really into it. She sang 'Don't Stop Believin' like no one ever has. And Dustin sang AND played guitar at the same time. It was pretty epic. We even got to do a duet to a Taking Back Sunday song. I definitely give credit to anyone who can sing and play an instrument at the same time. I could only truly focus on one or the other and both are just part of a game.

Plus pizza, Backstreet Boy singing/dancing, and stuffing the fattest little pillow.

A perf inappro night.