Me: Blah blah talking about Saved by the Bell.
Dustin: Yeah, Screech's girlfriend, Scratch.
Me: Her name was Violet not Scratch.
You know what's made me a proponent for assisted suicide? Life.
Me: Don't be a little shit.
Dustin: You're basically telling me not to be myself.
Me: Fuck, I clogged the toilet.
Dustin: You're the Britney of toilets...(starts singing)...oops you did it again.
On the phone with Dustin...
Me singing in morning traffic: Don't let them get in. It's their own fault they didn't merge over again.
Dustin: What a jingle. You should get signed to Fat Fish Records. Maybe play at the Smash Club.
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