An Open Letter to My 15 Year Old Self

One of my fave bloggers posted this on HelloGiggles the other day. It made me think about what I would say to my own 15 year old self.

Dear 15 Year Old Ashley,

First, put on your damn glasses. I know you won't start wearing them full time until junior year but you will find that not only can you see the world more clearly, but you will start to love them. They will become part of your identity and believe it or not, one day you will feel more beautiful in them than without them.

You have always thought math was your enemy. You two have never seen eye to eye. But you might actually learn something if you went to that class more often. So instead of skipping to go to McDonalds, skip on over to class. Speaking of school, really take the time to appreciate your friends. Spend more time with them instead of worrying about boys. I promise you that only 4 years from now you will find that love you so badly want. Not only will you fall head over heals for a lip ring wearing, drummer, with a passion for the Steelers but he'll end up becoming your husband and the two of you will create such a happy, fun life together.

You still love Harry Potter all these years later. You should tell your grandma how much her giving you The Sorcerer's Stone last year really meant to you. But also read and enjoy other books. Immerse yourself in them just as you do while reading Harry Potter. Even some of those required reading books you just skimmed through for English are pretty good.

Learn to speak up for yourself. I know you have such a hard time doing so but eventually you learn that telling people exactly how you feel can be such a relief. Better to learn that sooner than later. I know it's hard. I know you panic just thinking about it but once you get it out, you'll feel so much better. Never apologize for being honest.

Enjoy doing nothing. Take in feeling bored. It's not such a bad thing having all the free time that you do. You will soon get your first job and that's it. You'll be a working girl from there on out.

Appreciate the moments with your family. The older you get the less they will be apart of your life due to time and distance. Let go of all the anger and hurt you are feeling towards your father. It's just a waste of time. Stop wishing for change when you know deep down it isn't coming. The sooner you mourn that relationship the better. And the constant fighting with your mother? It does get better once you move out. You two will never be on the same page. Your personalities just don't click but you will find a peace with it and learn to cherish the moments that there aren't any yelling, rolling of eyes, or frustration. Keep spending as much time as you can with your brother even though it will never feel like enough. He will grow up so quickly and soon he'll be THE teenager. He'll be the one who walks you down the aisle on your wedding day and it will be a very special moment for the two of you.

There will be lots of struggles headed your way but just remember to breathe and know it will all pass eventually. Also, some of the best times of your life are still yet to come. Try not to rush so much. Just stay in the moment and take things as they come. You're going to be just fine. Better than fine.

Love,
Future You