Dustin Says

Me: "I like that Emma Watson says "Fuck" in that 'This is the End' movie."
Dustin: "I like when she's a nice witch with manners."

"I can't believe I saw you out in the wild."

"Why watch Teen Mom when you could be keeping up with the Kardashians?"

"What day is my birthday on?"

"You are aggression and I am defiance."

Dustin: "What is this?"
Me: "A tampon."
Dustin: "But it's so small. I was trying to figure out what kind of candy it was."

"I'm saving my money for downloadable content (Tiger Woods). I'm not going to waste it on strippers!"

Dustin walks in the room and I explain to him that the Buckwild West Virginian's went to New York.
"This is exactly what it's like when I hang out with Pat."